Wednesday, August 5, 2015

Dating Advice from a Cheap Guy - Gone Fishing


 
GONE FISHING
"You won’t find any sharks fishing in your local pond."

I’m not here to give you dating advice, but I will point out how your current dating practices affect your finances. So here’s the scene, it’s Friday night, you get all “jazzed up”, put on your best cologne/perfume and head out to the bar. You stand in line to pay a cover just to stand there, maybe hit a two-step here and there, until the DJ says last call and you go home. This leads to sappy posts on social media about “God is saving me for the chosen one” (vomit). While this can be true, you have to analyze your part in the situation and adjust. Maybe you’re fishing in the wrong location for what you want to catch.

 If I was on the market, I would look for a potential mate in places where I frequent myself. Unfortunately, Netflix doesn’t double as a dating service so you’ll have to venture outside of your house.  (Netflix dating site should def be a thing) If you enjoy art galleries attend them alone and I’m sure there will be other singles there as well. It’s a waste of money to frequent bars looking for a soul mate while losing your dignity on social media with those emo posts. Sporting events are great to socially meet like minds and what man wouldn’t love a woman who can attend a game and half way enjoy it?!  It’s ok if she doesn’t quite understand politics but she can talk for hours about football, oh that’s a winner! If you enjoy working out, then join a local gym. This is a two for one special, you’re getting in shape and still looking for potential mates. This is a better way to spend your money than pouring atrocious amounts of liquor down your throat that you are now at the gym to burn off.

 Besides all that, you’re too old to be looking for love in the club. News Flash, sane people don’t attend the club scene looking for a lifetime love. If that’s what you’re looking for, quit wasting your time looking for it in a club. Recently a good friend found her fiancée in a rest home. I’m serious, a rest home! She was a fellow youthful single leaving the club scene in hopes to find love. She began volunteering at her local rest home. Guess who has a rolodex of young single men?? The elderly who get frequent visits from their grandchildren.

The moral of the story is quit wasting money and time fishing in the wrong holes. 

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