Monday, June 29, 2015

Your shower shouldn't take longer than a Drake song..

Unless you lived under a rock for the last six years, you know who Aubrey “Drake” Graham is and I’m willing to bet my life that you’ve had your emotions change from listening to one of his songs on a long drive heading back to your hometown for the holidays after a break up…. I digress, but back to Drake. The point I’m attempting to make is- if by the chorus of a Drake song, if you can be rethinking your life, it can also provide a timer for you to realize it’s time to get out of the shower. Like seriously, a shower shouldn’t take longer than a Drake song. You mean to tell me that it takes more time for you to wash your body than it does to have an argument with yourself about whether to contact your ex (but stop short remembering all the hurt they caused you)? It takes you that much time to wash?You tell me Drake has enough time to drunk dial his ex on Marvin’s Room, have a full conversation over a catchy beat, in an attempt to get some late night loving, but you can’t shower in 5 minutes and 46 seconds? Seriously, lives have been altered during Drake songs and you’re telling me you can’t speed up something you’ve been doing your whole life? By now this should be like Steph Curry from three, a quick and thoughtless action. You have to cut your shower time down, to quote every mom in the world “You ain’t got that much to wash”!! A Drake song is all you need to get in the shower and wash the day’s filth off of yourself and hide the tears from the onset of emotions in the shower water. Once Aubrey is done spilling his soul, get out the shower!

All jokes aside, spending too long in the shower can drain your bank account! A year’s worth of lengthy showers could cost you about $1,500. I’m 100% in favor of showering EVERY DAY, but I’m also 100% against spending 10 minutes in the shower. Seriously think about it, if you took shorter showers you could quite possibly remodel the bathroom in a couple years! If you feel uncomfortable listening to Drake while you're in shower, set a timer on your cell phone. When the timer goes off, get out of the shower!

No comments:

Post a Comment