Wednesday, February 11, 2015

Valentine's Day!!!

Alright fellas here we are…the biggest day of the year for women is upon us, Valentine’s Day! Let’s face it, at this point Christmas isn’t about her any more.  Women spend the entire Christmas season saying “I just want to see the smiles on everyone’s faces”.  Her birthday isn't that big of a deal anymore, because what woman wants to be reminded of how old she’s getting?? But Valentine’s Day?? Yea my brother that’s what she has circled on her calendar. It’s the reason why she sat through the Super Bowl, pretending to like your best friend’s girlfriend. It’s the reason why she’s been extra nice since Christmas, even though she hated your Christmas gift. This is the day that women get to flood social media with just how much they are loved. All this happiness at the expense of some sick fool who spent his entire disposable budget on public displays of affection.

So what do you do?  You’re in love, and you really want to show her how much you care. I get it bud, been there and got two of the T-Shirts to prove it. First we must be honest, Valentine’s Day is all about who can make the biggest public display of affection. If you realize that much then you’ll be able to navigate this pointless event. My first Valentine’s Day in college I lucked out, I won a raffle for a Valentine’s Day gift set…the gift set was HUGE! Since I had just started dating the girl I removed the “I love you” candy (which my roommate and I ate) and gave her the remainder of the gift. She got to parade around with this huge bear showing it to her friends and I got a belly full of candy. Easy win! Now I know everyone won't be so lucky to win a raffle three days before Valentine’s Day, so allow me to tell you about my experience the following year. The following year (with the same girl) our romantic relationship had progressed, but I was still on a similar tight college student’s budget.  Knowing that I wanted to represent well in the “What did he get you conference?” I had to come up with something huge. Enter probably the greatest/cheesiest/cheapest gift in history of mankind. I went to her house and arranged little tea candles outside of her window. When she got home, I called her cell phone and asked her to come to her balcony. She walked out to candles laid in a heart design, and me with a fist full of flowers. It cost me a whopping $9.  Pictures were taken, sent to friends and I was the king of the world…

Seriously fellas, your girlfriend’s entire Valentine’s Day can be a success for very little money! Here’s a few simple steps to ensure that your girl will have a great day:

Never go out to dinner on Valentine’s Day!

This is a rookie mistake that will be costly. You will also spend more time in line then you will eating.  I once spent an uncomfortable evening squeezed into an amazing restaurant. Restaurants offer a
special menus for Valentine’s Day, usually it’s a scaled down offering by the chef, but with higher prices. You’ll stand in line for hours and receive terrible service by an overworked waitress.  Set up a restaurant
at home. Even go the distance of printing out a menu, yea it’s cheesy but you’ll thank me later!

Think Public
The bigger, the better! The smaller the budget, the bigger the display it needs to be. Most grocery stores have very cheap flower offerings, grab a few flowers and show up at her job. If you live in a place
with nice weather set up a picnic in the park.

Think of her single friend.

Women’s feelings are affected by others. So undoubtedly your girlfriend has a friend who doesn’t have someone to spend Valentine’s Day with.  You don’t need those sad vibes ruining the work you're
putting in! So a simple box of candy with BOTH you and your girlfriends names on it (this will also help the next time you screw up).

Get creative
Unless this is the year that you're going to propose you shouldn’t break the bank on Valentine’s Day. Challenge yourself to stay under a limit while providing a lasting memory. Leaving sticky notes all over
the apartment that she’ll see while getting ready for work. This idea would cost you nothing (take the notes from the office). Buying a Beyoncé concert DVD and sitting through the entire show will cost you
nothing but your pride during checkout (speaking from experience). Fill her room with balloons, write a note in every balloon about something you like/love about her.

Reuse ideas from the past.

Phil Jackson has the triangle offense. He’s won multiple championships with this offense. While personnel has changed the triangle offense remains the same. I’m sure Michael Jordan doesn’t converse with Kobe
about Phil’s coaching techniques. So don’t be afraid to reuse good ideas from past relationships. Let’s be honest............ you don’t even talk to your ex-girlfriend, so you don’t have to worry about the current and the past comparing notes about past life events.

The probation period
There isn't any reason why you should provide the moon and the stars for a girl you just started dating.  Keep it simple if you just started dating. Simple grocery store flowers and a box of candy will do the trick while she is in this probation period. Once she’s out of this period, she will be able to access the perks of a full time employee.  Fellas don’t use this as an excuse to not get her anything, however keep it very simple! A box of candy and a card. Keep in mind if you set the bar to high, you’ll have a lifetime of attempting to outdo yourself each year.

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